I was on Twitter a few days ago, just reading my timeline, when one guy I follow tweeted “why is it that music that degrades women, girls quote and like it, etc…. but in reality when a nigga says the same thing to them they trip?
When I saw this, I felt compelled to reply since I am a woman and I listen to music so I replied with, “because when it’s in a song, it’s not saying it directly to us, but if you tell me that to my face then yes I will get mad.”
When I said, it made sense and it is something I’ve been feeling my whole life. But then he said, “that don’t make any sense if the rapper is directing it to females as a whole…..”
So I replied by saying “saying something in a song is way different than saying it to someone’s face.”
But then I thought about it. Is it? Because I’m not only a woman, I’m black, I’m young, I’m a college student, I’m an aggie, and I’m a southerner. If someone generalized us and said something negative about any one of those groups I belong to in a song I would surely get mad. It wouldn’t matter if they weren’t speaking directly towards me, they were talking about one of the groups I belong to so I would get mad. If you’re saying it about one of us, you’re saying it about all of us. Maybe that’s not the best reaction, but that would be my reaction.
So why is it that a person can say something about lets say black people and I would get mad, but if a rapper said something about women in a song I would just say “well he isn’t talking about me.”
I thought about it and still haven’t come up with an answer. I suppose women have been told that “it’s no big deal” or “there are some women who act like this and we rappers are talking about those women, but not all.” But how is that so? How are we suppose to know that and why shouldn’t we take it personal. Since the beginning of my time I’ve been taught that what rappers say in songs are just art or just them expressing themselves and if they aren’t talking about me, then I shouldn’t get mad. But if you take a chance and say something derogatory about a group of people, you should expect criticism right? But most rappers don’t even feel like the criticism they get is even justified. Nonetheless, I’ve adopted that “if he’s not talking about me, then I don’t care” way of thinking and haven’t questioned it.
But today, I am questioning it. I don’t listen to rap that much and I really don’t like to listen to music that degrades women because rappers who rap like that aren’t really saying anything I want to hear, but if the song has a good beat and a good chorus, I will push the degradement( I think I just made up that word; whatever it fits) to the side.
I’ve noticed my behavior and realize it’s wrong and it isn’t helping women as a whole by letting men get away with this. I’m not perfect and I’m not gonna promise that I won’t listen to songs that degrade us women, but I am trying. I’m trying to look for the answers and maybe when I find the answers I can then change my behavior. I challenge everyone and especially women to ask themselves “why is it ok for men to degrade women in raps song. Why don’t we get offended?” If you do get offended great, but if you don’t ask yourself why you don’t and try to come up with an answer.
If anyone has any insight they would like to add, leave a comment below. I love getting into intellectual conversations with others. Keep it cute though.